relief

pathways June 18th, 2010

Sometimes it is not until the feeling of relief that you will realize  how much stress was running around, wreaking havoc within and without your body. As a single mom and full time grad student, I am on a very close budget and so when my support does not arrive in a timely way or at all for months, it really gets my concern. I am happy to report that an amount towards the balance was paid by Mr. Skatoff.  Perhaps this means that he does intend to pay his child support. At any rate it has been so long that any amount is a relief. We will look forward to the balance.  Going forward, regular timely payments as mandated by his court order would be great!

Lesson? Try not to identify with the stress of the moment, because it will change. Try to ride it like a surfer and remember you are devine .

De-stress yourself

Bad Eggs and Short Pants: A tragicomedy in an act of fear.

pathways March 3rd, 2010

Once upon a time and to this day, all over the world, at various points in human history there has been a struggle between the dark and the light. It exists still, and is felt as separation, but only in human consciousness, within the small confines of the brain. It is there that it is recognized, nurtured, paid attention to, codified, understood, acknowledged, worshiped, verified and made manifest. Outside of the human experience, knowledge of this does not exist. It is seen by Ego, the force of survival. We don’t just make the distinctions based on the idea of survival verses non survival, to further ensure the continuance of the species and therefore the quest, we tell ourselves moral stories about it all as well. We make separation distinctions like me/you, us/them. We believe in separation from the source of us as much a we believe in our beliefs and thoughts.

We are the force that agrees with our thoughts and beliefs, but we are not the actual thoughts and beliefs. We are more than that. Indeed we are spiritual beings having a physical experience and who knows what else. It is the human story, a balancing act of love and fear. Are we uniquely designed to choose between love and fear thereby breaking through the illusion against the energy of on and off? Without off there could be no on. Without fear, everything would express love only and so, there would be no recognizable love. Opposing forces are the calling card of the physical plane. The physical plane of existence depends, in fact on the principles of on and off, light and dark, positive and negative, love and fear. Here is a delicate balance of opposites. Here is but one aspect of God presence. When I say God, I am speaking of an energy, a verb, an evolving consciousness. The closest human emotions to knowing God are Love and compassion. The word emotion, from Latin, is emovere < e-, out +movere, move>. Emotions move thoughts and feelings out and connect spiritual with physical. Emotions contain valuable lessons allowing our unique gifts to function.

Whatever you are comfortable calling it, higher power in twelve step language, Love, God, that which made the heart beat, the source behind the driving force of Spring, seeks recognition, and acknowledgment as I believe God does, and we are the creatures who have evolved a consciousness capable of knowing God. So everything in creation is imbued with God’s Code through our unique ability to receive this connection. God witnesses herself through our ability to explore her. Our DNA has evolved in order to adapt God’s code, or consciousness and physically converts and expresses God in God’s search to be witnessed and known. This self introspective system seems to only function within human witnessing and not out there in the other species, the world or Universe. I my opinion, this is why were are here: simply to know Love. Creation is highly efficient and makes no spare parts. Because of this ability, and its uniqueness to us, I believe it is why we are here.
Why else would the Universe spew out such creatures with this one unique function? There is one thing I was taught from the organized religion that I do believe, is the truth. That is, that God is Love. I believe that Love is God and that Love is our source.

For a variety of highly distorted reasons and cover-ups, the word and concept of God has become laden and such an issue for so many people. There are those who believe in the value of their beliefs and there are those who became jaded and felt deceived by their religions and blame Love (God) for this. God never made a single religious concept. All of God’s proclaimed messengers have primarily been about Love. I am more comfortable referring to God as Love. So if you were to ask, I would say I believe in Love Consciousness. Love consciousness is here, and felt by us in this physical plane, as its physical receptor. Whether or not I tune in is my choice, but it none the less is working through me. We are in God’s physical expression. I suspect that there are an infinite number of fields and that God is manifest in all of them. As we evolve with our human consciousness we are, in a sense, surfing back to the source, that is, to Love. God’s code is written for consciousness. Why else do we have this unique distinction? How smart, it is to make us not just recycled stuff for the sake of breeding and supporting the physical plane. But we have the added feature of introspection, ethics and choice. Choice may be where God or Love consciousness is embedded. The source of all creation is in each one of us but we are hypnotized by our thoughts and beliefs and bound by the laws of the physical world. We choose between Love and fear in fact, with everything we do.

It is only when Love represents something scary (like telling the truth when we believe the truth will cause suffering), that we choose behaviors that are ultimately self-destructive and spiritually toxic. We are dis functional when we gain comfort from behaviors which arise out of fear. Allowed to continue, then we are looking at addictive behavior. Addictive behavior is the handiwork of fear and focusing away from your true nature as a product of the Love of the Universe.

Top Ten Reasons Why Your Life May Not Be As You Want It To Be

pathways March 3rd, 2010

  1. Resistance
  2. Believing in and telling lies
  3. Setting yourself up
  4. Not being in charge
  5. Listening to and believing in fear
  6. Over identifying in false states of awareness (trances)
  7. and Forgetting your true nature and origin
  8. Low self esteem
  9. Harboring delusions about attachment and surrendering
  10. Maintaining a toxic mind and body

Some more thoughts about Career Counseling

pathways March 3rd, 2010

It is true that career counselors must be aware of the client’s needs and issues that are specific to him or her culturally; where he or she is along the career decision making process. Additionally, it is worth knowing “where they are in establishing different levels of confidence” so that as counselors we can “enhance self-efficacy” (Laureate Education, 2007). This theory embraces the idea that confidence, interest level, and the belief that one is capable of the task at hand play a pivotal and integral role in deciding career-paths.

The developmental approach to career counseling, in specific, Super’s Life-Span Theory acknowledges that influences other than chronological age influence career development. The instruments associated with this theory examine interests, values and skills. I believe that it is important to be aware of the issues involved in this kind of assessment because until a client is clear about the values s/he possess, s/he cannot achieve satisfaction, in my opinion.

Special populations like those in recovery from drug addiction, and who in many cases are starting over, are often just finding out what are his or her true values. Some individuals are so conditioned by strong external influencing powers and are not even aware of having values, let alone what it is that they are. The Minnesota Importance Questionnaire (MIQ) (1981), measures needs and values in order to predict satisfaction. I am a student who has never been in the field but I will hang my future license on the theory that one’s values and beliefs must be in sync in order to feel purpose and lasting happiness. In my opinion, satisfaction also depends on living a life that is harmonious with one’s beliefs and values.

Values are backed-up by behavior, in my opinion, because no one does anything again and again without some perceived or real benefit. Therefore, if I am a traditional Roman Catholic, working at an abortion clinic, presumably, I would be experiencing various forms of unhappiness and dissatisfaction because what I do from day to day conflicts with my core beliefs. It is when my values and beliefs are not harmoniously synchronized, that I am feeling out of balance. My entire life could end up compensating for this inner conflict and result in a host of illnesses as a result. Therefore in conjunction with a values assessment I believe one must also look at the client’s underlying beliefs.

The Career Beliefs Inventory (CBI) helps clients to understand the perhaps ancient and hidden beliefs that a person still adheres to even when those beliefs hinder satisfaction. Krumboltz (as cited by Capuzzi & Stauffer, 2006) said: “What appears to be inappropriate or self-defeating behavior may become understandable when one discovers the assumptions and beliefs on which each person operates” (p.127). Straightening out a client’s beliefs is essential in determining how to assist him or her in career choices. I believe that these two tests are especially beneficial to my special population because when people are rebuilding their lives, doing so with a strong and self-aware foundation is more likely to produce lasting success.

References:

Capuzzi, D., & Stauffer, M. D. (2006). Career counseling: Foundations, perspectives, and applications. Boston, MA: Pearson Education.

DVD
Laureate Education, Inc. (Executive Producer). (2007). Vocational psychology and counseling. Baltimore: Author.

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